Although not it's true intention, Labor Day has become the unofficial "goodbye to summer" day, and the weather in Chicago today agrees. Most people look back on summer overcome with the general mood of those Sarah Mclachlan ASPCA commercials. I, on the other hand, think back to days when my bra was like a Slip'N Slide or when my fingers swelled to the size of bratwurst, and gladly wave goodbye.
Don't get me wrong, I love sitting on the beach, for about 10 minutes, and having my sunglasses on when I didn't have time to do my eye makeup before work. But the humidity poofs my hair, you can't walk more than 5 minutes without needing another shower, and the nice "relaxing" beaches are filled with children who repeatedly shovel sand directly on to your lap despite multiple scoldings from both you and his mother (I'm talking about you you little Air and Water Show bastard)!
I happily bid it farewell to bathing suits riding up my ass for curling up in my Chicago Bears hoodie with a good beer and watching my favorite shows return to television. I will blissfully trade in my weird tan lines in celebration of being only one shade of my natural whiteness and gladly enjoy an evening of a cool light breeze and a hot tea on the patio.
I can't wait for the leaves to turn every friendly shade of red, brown and gold and feel them crunch below my feet as I take my boots out of retirement for another season. I'm positively giddy at the chance to cheer (most likely in vain) for the Bears from some dive bar with friends all wrapped up in jerseys and scarves.
They say that Spring is the season of love but I would have to make the case for Fall, when the air is fresh and crisp and the holidays are just around the corner. There's no big festival. event, or vacation to drag you out into the world. Everything simply slows down, and you grab your favorite blanket, person, animal (or any combination of the three) and spend an evening in, just content to be still.
Let the hibernation begin!
Balls
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